This movie is oddly significant in b-movie history. First off, this was made as Jean Claude Van Damme was heading towards his peak, having come off the double hits of Bloodsport and Kickboxer (pity he had to go spoil it by making Black Eagle too) he made this, his first real sci-fi movie. Secondly, this is the movie which starts director/writer Albert Pyun on his bizarre fascination with cyborg movies which would see him make Knights, Nemesis 1, 2, 3, and 4, Heatseeker, and Omega Doom - all of which I will probably get to eventually. I can’t blame him ‘cyborg’ is a very fun word to use, CYBORG CYBORG CYBORG HEE HEE HEE!!!!

Think that’s weird? When shown on TV, one bright spark came up with a new name for it: Masters of the Universe 2: The Cyborg. I kid you not.

A grim voice-over tells of what happened to the devastated Earth, first the wars pummelled the planet into submission, and then a plague came to try and take what remained of humanity. A group of scientists in Atlanta are working on a cure for the plague, something the guy doing the voice-over doesn’t like, because he LIKES the death, he LIKES the misery, HEEEE LIIIKES THIS WOOOOORRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLD!!!!!! This is no ordinary voice-over guy you see, this is the voice of our villain, the mysterious Fender Tremolo (Vincent Klyn) the leader of a vicious gang who are in the process of chasing a man and a woman through deserted city streets. The man attempts to hold them off while she escapes, but he is slaughtered easily by the evil formulaic post-apocalyptic b-movie bad guys, the last thing he sees is Fender taking off his shades to reveal EVIL CONTACT LENSES OF DOOM. Fender is supposed to be a cyborg I think, its not really discussed or shown conclusively until the end. Anyway, the woman is more fortunate however, as she is saved from attack by none other than our hero Jean Claude, playing Gibson Rickenbacker (I’m sensing a trend in these names, are his henchmen called Effects Pedal Kramer and B.C Rich DiMaggio?). The rest of the gang appear and attack, leaving Gibson for dead and taking the woman with them. This is no ordinary woman though, this is a cyborg named Pearl Prophet, who holds vital information for the creation of the cure for the plague! She needs to get back to Atlanta (a flashback Pearl has shows them leaving Atlanta for New York) and Fender says he will take her back, so he can own the cure for himself! DOH!

Gibson comes around soon after and heads after them, encountering the extremely stupid, yet brave Nady Simmons (no, she’s not called Sunburst Marshall or Wah Wah Gretsch). She wants to go after Fender and his gang to rescue Pearl Prophet and tries to convince Gibson to help her, though he is only interested in finding Fender. What is Gibson’s connection to Fender? Well we get lots (and LOTS!) of flashback scenes where Gibson helps a woman and her two younger siblings and ends up staying with them, until Fender (sans EVIL CONTACT LENSES OF DOOM for no good reason) and his gang show up anyway. He reluctantly agrees to let Nady tag along, presumably so he has an excuse to have fights with people when she keeps getting herself into trouble. Gibson and Nady fight their way through hostile territory which inevitably leads to a final showdown in Atlanta.

So its pretty formulaic-sounding innit? Well I guess it is, save for the ‘unique’ directing style of Albert Pyun that makes the whole narrative that much more difficult to follow thanks to his over-use of flashback sequences that you’ll be sick to death of them by the end of the movie. They spoil the flow of the movie and frequently over-complicate scenes by teasing what the flashbacks are going to tell you later, even though they actually have very little effect on the plot, its not like the flashbacks reveal a plot twist, its all so bloody obvious to start with. Mr. Pyun also sets his films in a world that is seemingly logic-free, where you can get sail from New York to Atlanta by sea in a couple of days, and where men can survive being crucified in the desert (on the mast of a decaying boat, no less) as long as they’re REALLY, REALLY ANGRY.

But I’m being very cruel, because despite Pyun’s confused style, this is a rather entertaining movie. Jean Claude is one of the reasons for this, playing one of his ultra-serious-doesn’t-talk-very-much roles where he kicks people and shows off his impressive physique. He looks good in the action scenes, even if the people he’s beating on look like they just walked on set and were told to just run at Van Damme and not ask any questions. Vincent Klyn also gets a mention for his eccentric and just plain terrible performance as Fender, the guy IS very impressively built and is just a big old monster of a man, especially in the final showdown. Nady was played by Deborah Richter, and you’ll be BEGGING someone to kill her by the end of the movie, as she’s just annoying and gets in the way. Other than that the performances are pretty functional and empty, though I DID spot German body builder Ralph Moeller as one of Fender’s grunts who also shocked me by appearing as that really big guy in Gladiator, and was also the main bad guy in Best of the Best 2.

Action-wise, its pretty much just Van Damme hitting people with little resistance like you’d expect. One thing that sets them apart is that Pyun has a good eye for interesting places to film, he uses what looks like a half-built industrial building of some sort for some scenes that came off as convincing, and probably cheaper to use than a more fake-looking set would have been. As this is an early Van Damme movie some will want to know about the martial arts, but I’m sorry to say that its all pretty basic except for a couple of Van Damme’s mandatory cool kicks. They’re not all that well filmed either, not always picking up on the action very well, though that could be the effect of the pan-and-scan version I have. The final showdown is okay if a little unspectacular, but is also eerily similar to the final showdown from Universal Soldier, hmm, and Ralph Moeller was in Universal Soldier too.....

So what we have is a solid, if unspectacular post-apocalyptic actioner. Van Damme fans should enjoy seeing him before he became a parody of himself, and Pyun fans (I’m presuming I’m not the only one) can see what started his weird series of movies with cyborgs in them. At worst it’s a decent rental, and it spawned two sequels if you want to make a night of it, though neither of them were made by Pyun or star Van Damme, and don’t really have anything to do with the first movie anyway, ironic really considering the TV title for this one. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go change my name to Statocaster Ibanez.